WHY HAIKU
Some folks don’t like haiku. I do. I've archived a few in honor of my Aunt Mary Louise Schneeberger (1906-2005), who appeared regularly in the Carmel Pine Cone with haiku that then-Mayor Clint Eastwood took a shining to. She reported that he told her once, "I pick up the paper only to see whether you're in it, Mary Louise."
The Bay Area News Group ran a themed haiku challenge from fall 2008 to November 2010. BANG began with weekly haiku columns that diminished to once a month or less often. The haiku challenge was fun while it lasted.
The following 28 of mine (in bold) made it into West County Times newsprint on the days shown. A few others are otherwise noted. Thanks for the haiku genes, Aunty Maryla.
Orange limerick 11/1/10
(BANG's Jackie Burrell changed the challenge from haiku to limerick for November, announcing no new haiku or limerick challenges will occur for a while. Happy hiatus and happy holidays, JB.)
There's a comic by Hilary Price.
"Rhymes with Orange" is not always nice.
I laugh anyway
Because I'm that way.
Morning coffee goes better with vice.
Cliché theme 9/6/10
"I mean, you know" is
a four-word cliché glitch some
stutter to stall time.
Travel theme 7/5/10
Wings tucked, we poultry
shuffle past First Class to squeeze
into nugget shapes.
Pet-peeve theme 6/7/10
It seems peevish to
have a pet peeve when we are
luckier than most.
Mom theme 5/3/10
Widowed three times, Mom
at 87 found love
once more with dear Vlad.
Our mom's made more than
300 muumuus, never
quitting her sewing.
Rabbit theme 4/5/10
runner-up, online:
Dust bunnies know how
to proliferate whether
or not I feed them.
Rain-drenched theme 3/1/10
Fog is easier
on the psyche than slivers
of sharp, stinging rain.
Noir theme 1/4/10
Black and white and read
all over, the news bleeds noir
on screen or paper.
Thanksgiving theme 11/16/09
Gangs of turkeys roam
country roads, pardoned by us,
their fellow creatures.
Halloween theme 10/5/09
runner-up, online:
"Orange you cute in
your Halloween costume" is
fall's knock-knock answer.
Labor Day theme, 9/7/09
After enjoying
Labor Day weekend playtime,
we grouch back to work.
"Heat's on summer verse," 8/3/09
When Bay breezes stop,
all that was cool this morning
is suddenly hot.
"School's out," May 2009
For the May 2009 "school's out" theme I submitted the allowed two. Neither made the printed paper, but one showed up online:
Runners up in the haiku contest:
Prevent hardening
of the categories by
learning from the young.
"IRS," 4/13/09
Taxes prove we were
alive -- receipts for getting
and spending, archived.
"St. Patrick's Day," 3/16/09
Better than gold at
rainbow's end was finding a
fun Irish husband.
"Dr. Seuss," 3/2/09
Seuss bet Cerf he could
tell a story, using just
fifty words. Seuss won.
“Ground Hog Day,” 2/2/09
Prognosticating
with shadows, Plato in his
cave or Groundhog Phil?
Ground Hog Day could be
a cookout for hamburger
or pig but isn't.
“Castaways,” 1/29/09
We're all castaways
on island earth, rotating
in oceans of space.
“New Year’s resolutions," 1/5/09
Resolving to start
dieting, I have just one
last very small snack.
“James Bond,” 11/5/08
Oh, to be a Bond
girl, but even young, I was
no Halle Berry.
"Bond, James Bond," he says.
Then "Shaken, not stirred," while I,
eyes on screen, am both.
“Joe,” 10/27/08
Joe and Marilyn
left our realm, escaping all
rude paparazzi.
Knock three times, whisper
low. Hernando must make sure
that you're in with Joe.
Little Women's Jo
is no Joe, so must march out
of this male haiku.
“Trick-or-treat,” 10/20/08
Out late, asking for
candy, you'd better be young
or you are mooching.
“TV characters,” 10/6/08
Flawed Don Draper, Mad
Men’s strong-jawed hunk, makes me yearn
for my shorthand pad.
Sixties typewriters
click like sharp heels on Mad Men
backs. Ask Don Draper.
“Wailing on Wall Street,” 9/29/08
Financial angst like
ours needs more than seventeen
stalwart syllables.
“Rush-hour Traffic,” 9/23/08
Change fingers, mister,
since I’m changing lanes fast to
get out of your way.